I Miss U Mom

Mar 14
2005

I used to think that a son wouldn’t need
his mom so much after he grew up.
But now I realize that’s not true.

So often, when I’m making a decision
I wish you were here so I could ask your advice.
And so many times, when something happens
that I know you would enjoy,
I wish you were here to share it with me.

I miss the “just you and me”
times of being together,
times of giggles and laughter,
times of me crying on your shoulder
and listening to your pep talks,
and times of special heart to heart sharing.

Now that I’m older, I realize
how special our relationship is.
and while I’m thankful for this bond,
somehow it makes me miss you more.
Mom, I love you so very much.

Mom

Mar 14
2005

Days go by, approaching the end of time
But you walk as if there were no burden nor boredom
Ignoring illusions that fly higher and higher
Swallowing dreams with a smile in a endless prayer
With water that throw away any remorse.
You never change, never stop fighting
Even in darkness when the fog blocks your sight
Your eyes light up like thousands of torches
It touches my heart to see how you manage
To cross the stormy sea in your boat called patience
Guided by the wind of love
Into the coolness of the cold night
Or into the warmth of the hot sun
Paddling through waves with a never ending happiness
Carefully avoiding the hateful reefs,
Heading towards safety and security.

23

Mar 14
2005

Di kedalaman hatiku,
sebuah nyanyian yang hidup tak dapat ku ungkap.
Nyanyian yang membalut perasaanku dan senantiasa menyelubungi hatiku dengan irama yang terpendam.

Kepada siapakah akan kudendangkan lagu ini?
Kepadanyakah?
Kepadanya yang ku tahu telah memiliki tambatan didalam hatinya?
Haruskah nyanyian ini akan dinyanyikan oleh impianku belaka?
Apakah nyanyian ini akan dilanda persahabatan yang terjadi?
Ataukah kegelapan akan menenggelamkannya dan menguburnya didalam relung hatiku?

2000.ujung.

Mar 14
2005

Alangkah lebih mudahnya
Menyerah pada keputus asaan
Daripada berdiri
Berkata bahwa aku tidak diciptakan
untuk dikalahkan
Bisa dihancurkan, tapi tidak
dikalahkan

Lebih mudah jika menyerah
Daripada terus bertarung
menyabetkan pedang
Ketika kemenangan berarti
Ketidak mengertian
dalam kesia-siaan

Katakan padaku kepada siapa
Aku harus berpihak
Pada Chairil atau Hemingway?

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